Thursday, November 22, 2012

Grain Free Pumpkin Cranberry Bread

Ah, the beauty of food via Facebook... Just Eat Real Food posted this recipe from Edible Harmony. The original recipe is dairy-free, gluten-free, sugar-free.

http://www.edibleharmony.com/grain-free-pumpkin-cranberry-bread/

I thought to myself, "Gee, it's thanksgiving morning. This would be a fantastic seasonal breakfast and fun for child and I since it's simple."

And since the doctor removed her right ear tube Monday, I'm keeping her dairy free.

If you want the real recipe, go to Edible Harmony. If you want horrible misadventures in the kitchen, by all means read on.

Preface: I am finishing my last semester of college classes, after this I just need to finish my honors thesis. We're broke (like most of America). And I have a part-time job at Target which means I work full-time this week because of Black Friday. So right now this instant, I'm stressed.

And holidays tend to push my over the edge anyway.

I am an opening cashier tonight, which means I go in at 8:30 pm and cashier until 1:30 am. Then I go in tomorrow at 5 pm to close the café. To reset my body clock toward working late, I stayed up and watched a James Bond movie after punching out of work at 10:07.

My internal alarm clock woke me up at 7:15. Child was reading to herself out loud, so I got up and closed everyone's bedroom doors. Then, the cats started scratching at the door which went from annoying to amusing when one cat started attacking the cat who was scratching at the door.

So maybe baking wasn't the best course of action for a morning that started this way.

Child got the eggs. I called up the recipe on my phone. Six eggs. Left from out last trip to the farm. Exactly what we needed. And in my head I still have this reaction of "That's a LOT of eggs." I understand coconut flour requires gads of eggs but it's still a shock.

Especially when you've only had a 1/2 cup of coffee.

Child cracks all the eggs and puts them in a bowl. The recipe says to combine eggs, 12 pitted dates and 1/3 cup coconut oil in the food processor.

We dump in the eggs and the dates and child starts measuring 1/4 cup oil because I don't have a third. I let her jam the oil (coconut oil is a solid at room temp) into her cup and I fling some extra into the food processor.

When it's ready, I let her pulse forgetting that the edge of the food processor is broken and this stream of eggs and coconut oil spews onto the counter. Like the Incredible Hulk, I turn into stark raving mad lunatic mom.

What to do? I have to get those dates pulverized. Husband gets blender. With my sunny optimism, I remind him that this won't work and we're doomed.

It works for the dates. Child measures the coconut flour. I add 1/4 cup unsweetened applesauce to replace the egg mixture now on my counter. We blend. Blender stops. Coconut flour jams blender.

We reassemble poor food processor. Transfer mix to food processor. Realize blade isn't all the way down. Fiddle and twist.

Add remaining ingredients. Pulse. Recipe a for 1-2 teaspoons cinnamon. I love cinnamon. And my coconut flour bake goods tend to be bland, especially since I have taste buds so attuned to refine sugar.

The only cinnamon we have is in a grinder. Child grinds for what feels like an eternity.

We pulse. I add some local raw honey. Taste buds. Need to wean off sweet. We stir in cranberries. Plop into loaf pan. Batter seems to disappear.

We sprinkle unsalted pumpkin seeds on top. We bake.



Verdict: I need to get toothpicks so I don't keep using random household objects to poke baked goods.

This is delightful!

Success!



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